Archive for the ‘Cthulhu’ Category

I’m Glad I Waited, by a Sacrificial Virgin

 

by REINA HARDY

I admit it. Keeping myself pure for the Great Cthulhu has been a daily struggle. But, now that I’ve enjoyed the pomp and ceremony of my very first sacrificial death, I have just one thing to say: I’m glad I waited!

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve fended off an ardent suitor with the gentle words, “No dear, I’m saving myself for the Shambling Mountain,” while smiling pleadingly and crossing my legs firmly at the knee. Indeed, there were nights when I couldn’t wait, when I pressed myself against the chilly glass of my vestal window, dreaming of the Great Cthulhu’s welcoming maw, and cried out “When will the stars be right? When?”

Needless to say, when I received the Call, I was excited. My heart pounded. I began to hyperventilate, heaving my unbesmirched chest in a most pleasing way. Finally my long-cherished maidenhead would be put to its proper use! My violent death would appease the lust of He Who Slumbers, allowing my sacrificers, the members of Columbia University’s Science Fiction Society, to live! Perhaps months longer than they would otherwise!

And so, last night, at the appointed hour, I was brought to the tiny vestal chamber in Butler Library, where an attendant priestess arrayed me in the finest linen that can be stolen from Columbia University’s Lerner Hall storage. Stepping outside, I was immediately borne off by four strong and virile cultists, who hoisted me on their shoulders and paraded me throughout the study halls of Butler, so that the infidels might see my doomed purity, and know what dues are paid to the power of Great Cthulhu. They were sore afraid, I imagine. Particularly since the servitor had an octopus for a face.

A lot of thoughts ran through my head as the procession wound its way, singing and chanting, to the sacrificial sundial. “I wonder if they are planning to stab my heart or my chest?” “The High Priest’s fetish cuffs are digging into my neck.” “It’s drafty…is my sheet slipping?” But mostly, I was thinking, what would it be like? What would HE be like?

Finally, we reached the sundial, where the priests lowered me roughly onto the frigid marble and pinned me down by my ankles and my wrists. I looked up towards the cold moon and the dire configured stars. The masked and tentacled faces of the cultists loomed above me. I was a little nervous. All right, I was terrified! For a moment, as the High Priest drew his gleaming blade, I wondered if I’d done the right thing by consenting to die like this, so young, so unenjoyed.

But then the High Priest struck. As he thrust mercilessly into my inviolate flesh, spilling my blood across the stone, I knew. There’s nothing like the first time! My mortal screams rang out, all but overpowering the hypnotic chanting of the assembled cult, and I arched my back with ultimate joy, secure in the glory of a pure death. The High Priest continued to slash at my abdomen and throat in an orgiastic frenzy until the last few gurgles of life escaped my lips. My soul plummeted to Cthulhu’s slimy embrace while my ravished body was trundled off to Butler’s inner chambers, to gratify some of the High Priest’s darker desires.

And now that it’s all over, I couldn’t be happier that I waited! Sure, I missed a few of those fleshly pleasures enjoyed between a man and a woman, but now that I’ve had a whole day’s worth of experience as Cthulhu’s post-mortem slave, I’m beginning to realize that there are some things only tentacles can do. He Who Slumbers is the light of my afterlife. I am satisfied to praise Him and serve Him for the rest of eternity as best I can.

Finally, I’d just like to thank the wonderful people at the Campus Crusade, who gave me this unparalleled opportunity. May Cthulhu eat you last!


First published in Columbia University’s Federalist newspaper (The Fed) during Cthulhu Week 2000.

ISC Charges Arise From EU

Tuesday the International Cuttlefish Society (ISC) was implicated in a massive money laundering and tax evasion scheme that touched virtually every government in Europe. Sources say that the ISC had worked in coordination with various crime lords of Ukraine and Russia in an attempt to launder billions of dollars through local European aquariums and zoos in exchange for cooperation during what it described as the "end of all ends, the day His Worshipful Death would arise from his eternal slumber."

Apparently, the ISC was merely a cover for some sort of underworld cult hell bent on world destruction, but as of yet we have been unable to tie them with any particular religious order. Some have said that they are a front for a fictional group known as the Cult of Cthulhu based on the writings of H.P. Lovecraft, but that cannot be confirmed.

The ISC was laundering money for the gangsters by funneling it through various aquariums DSC_0064 and zoos as bloated charges for cuttlefish, cuttlefish care, and supplies. Since the ISC possesses a basic monopoly on cuttlefish breeding programs and cuttlefish skin harvesting, used by scientists, everyone attributed the gross increases to the global recession.

Representatives from the ISC were unreachable for comment, but followers and members world wide have been seen wearing tentacled masks and sporting large ceremonial daggers. 

"Some people are getting nervous," said an aquarium worker that wishes to remain anonymous, "cuttlefish are starting to disappear. And those people are everywhere!" Reporters for Al-Jazeera cornered one masked man who screamed, "Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn!" before the reporter, cameraman, and producer were all stabbed to death and their bodies dragged kelso_42off. The same phrase has turned up at several aquariums in the Mediterranean region, especially in Spain and Greece, painted in blood near entrances.

In a seemingly unrelated issue, thousands of ocean geologists are baffled by the apparent appearance of a previously uncharted island in the Pacific basin. The island evidently has what can only be described as non-euclidean buildings intact. Some are calling this the lost Atlantis, and many are making the pilgrimage there now.

Tentacled Tuesday #4

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Not sure where this came from but it looks pretty cool.

Tentacle Tuesday #5

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New Weird Class Warriors. Oh Really?

Though a long time advocate of M. John Harrison (though see my relatively recent post on Harrison on Lovecraft), I have found myself somewhat blindsided by the very same quote of Harrison’s which, I believe quite rightly, this blogger has railed against

No doubt apologists will say that Harrison was being ironic or somesuch, but sadly, I feel that the attitude Harrison unreflectively demonstrates in the claim that ‘it is undignified to read for the purposes of escape’ is indicative of so much of ‘New Weird’ and the earlier ‘New Wave’ of sci-fi literature (of which, I confess, i still consider myself a fan). Especially amongst a number of these genres’ acedemic/philosophical exegetes, who would style themselves as revolutionaries without really – I mean really – having any experiential or conceptual understanding of what it means not to have come from anything other than a relatively privileged middle-class background. Shame on them. All of them.

Joshi’s The Rise and Fall of the Cthulhu Mythos

Beware that this post continues with the trend of curmudgeonly bitterness common to my earlier scribblings. Though hopefully what I have to say wont end up alienating what few readers this blog retains. In any case, I’ve finally started reading Joshi’s The Rise and Fall of the Cthulhu Mythos and, two chapters in, a couple of things jump out.

Most notable of which is the fact that Joshi doesn’t offer up much so far in terms of a critical methodology. While he often points an accusatory finger at many mythos tales as having no literary merit, the manner in which this merit is to be measured (outside a set of rather conservative and unimaginative ‘abstract aesthetic standards’ that are ‘widely accepted’) lacks analytical depth. Maybe I’m being a bit harsh here, for in truth a lot of mythos fiction does tend to be a bit shit.

In any case Joshi doesn’t really seek methodological support from contemporary (for which read ‘faddish’) literary theorists. In chapter 1, for example, he takes a snide dig at Robert M. Price’s highly informed and theoretically rich insights into mythos fiction as the product of (a presumably suspect!) avante-gardism. Now, I’m not an expert in recent trends in literary criticism (though fortunately my sister is an academic who is) but it seems to me that Joshi is unfairly dismissive of some thirty odd years of developments in the field, many of which (far from being faddishly avante-garde) have come to inform the academic mainstream. In this respect it strikes me that Joshi, like Lovecraft, is a man out of his time.

Indications at this stage, then, are that anyone who doesn’t tow a line that broadly recapitulates Joshi’s own construction of Lovecraft are in for similar treatment – evident for example in Joshi’s insistence that his is the absolute authoritative definition of the meaning of the word Necronomicon and one that brooks no argument – especially from Price. Joshi’s literalism in this respect indicates a disappointing unwillingness to engage with wider developments in literary, critical and cultural theory.

That said, up to this point I’m finding the book insightful and enjoyable (when not infurating). More feedback as I delve deeper into the mouldering tome. By the way, if this does come across as rather elitist view of Joshi’s work, fear not – look out for a forthcoming iconoclastic post which takes a pop at recent obscurantist co-options of Lovecraft from within academia. Nice.

Mark Samuels Sighted

A few weeks ago I believe I caught, from the corner of my eye, the spectral figure of Mark Samuels lurking around the Lovecraft section (where else?) of London’s Forbidden Planet. Unfortunately I was in a rush to be somewhere else and (rather impolitely) didn’t have the time to say hello. For those not familar with Mark, he is a writer of some outstanding weird fiction and ‘mystical horror’. If you are a fan of Machen, Lovecraft and Ligotti chances are you will appreciate Mark Samuels’ writing.

I can’t claim to have known Mark very well, but became acquainted with him a few years ago via the London socials held by the Lovecraft Scholar’s yahoo group, and once had the pleasure of being invited by Mark to a meeting of (what I believe was)the almost mythical Sodality of Shadows one Saturday evening in Highgate. As I recall, the last time I saw Mark was at a send-off do at London’s Cittie of Yorke pub prior to his absconding to Mexico (from whence I understand he has recently returned).

In any case, this post is inspired by the fact that I’ve since discovered Mark has a new blog – while it’s fair to say I’d probably disagree with some of the religious views expressed therein, it is definitely worth checking out for afficianados of the weird. Of particular note is Mark’s April 7th post critiquing claims that it is the socio-political content of weird fiction which validates it as literature. Again, there’s some points that Mark raises which I would probably take issue with, although I think he makes a valid argument that even the most materialist of weird fiction often ends up transcending its own materialism. Indeed, I believe I am taking a similar position vis-a-vis Lovecraft’s ‘non-supernatural cosmic art’ in an article-in-progress (though on a personal note this doesn’t constitute a revision of my own atheism; in fact I think it is eminently possible to maintain a fairly stalwart position of atheism without denigrating human religiousity or indeed the need to reject the ‘naturalness’ of religious ideas).

Go Mark!

Knowing (WARNING: MAJOR SPOILERS)

Greetings. Whilst the thick, gloopy strands of Azathothian entropy have entangled us further and drawn us deeper into the unreflective depths of cosmic ennui, we at Ghooric Zone are still making the occasional attempt – as the mood takes us – to pass on our reflections on Lovecraftian popular culture as and when the mood takes us. In all probability no one is listening anymore, but being the good Lovecraftians that we are, we don’t care and will continue spouting our jibber-jabber into the audient void (often to the sound of atonal flutes and monotonous drumming).

On to business. If The Mist was purportedly a movie of existential horror with (as I have argued previously) an implicit moral message, then I’m about to suggest that Knowing is at its core a movie of existential, materialistic (and, dare I say it, Lovecraftian) horror masquerading as a ‘feel good’ movie (albeit one concerning the end of the world). Please be warned that the following contains major spoilers regarding the film’s plot. In fact, I’m about to tell you how it ends.

Broadly speaking the film is a category (though not in the strictest sense) of what Brian Aldiss has elsewhere called a ‘shaggy god’ story , where religious or biblical themes and stories turn out to have science-fictional causes. It is also a film the where the ancient astronaut hypothesis is implicitly invoked; additionally, Knowing shares a certain kinship with M. Night Shyamalan’s Signs, where an apocalyptic science fiction premise is actually concealing a spiritual message about hope subverting meaninglessness and the existence of life –after-death. In brief, Knowing is about how space aliens (who turn out to look a bit like angels) save some children from the end of the world and spirit them off to an Eden-like planet (replete with Biblical Tree of Knowledge) along with some pairs of animals (rabbits, actually – quite useful being the fast breeders they are and hence providing a potentially indefinite supply of protein) a la Noah (the film-makers certainly seemed to enjoy mixing their Biblical metaphors). Oh, and somehow along the way the atheistic astrophysicist Nicholas Cage (whose mechanistic materialism is a consequence of his wife meaningless death in a fire – a bit like Mel Gibson’s character in Signs) finally comes to believe in life after death (a bit like Mel Gibson’s character in Signs), helpfully reconciling with his pastor father before Cage, his remaining family and the rest of the Earth’s population die horribly in a conflagration caused by a massive solar flare.

The mirroring of the intervention of the aliens with the story of Noah seems to be the locus of this spiritual message – that there is hope, that death isn’t really the end, that there are more things out there than are dreamt of it our philosophy and so on. But wait a minute…the film implies that nothing happens without a reason – death isn’t a matter of random unthinking chance. Does this mean that the end of the world was itself part of a bigger plan? Given that in the film the space aliens – following the ancient astronaut hypothesis – are the secular analogue of God (or at least His angelic instruments) might this imply that they themselves instigated the apocalypse? Interestingly, when taking human form the aliens do seem to conform to the ‘Nordic’ or ‘Aryan’ extraterrestrials beloved of most right-wing ufologist crack-heads. Perhaps after all, they really were space-Nazis conducting a eugenics programme on a massive scale? Hmm…maybe they should have got Mel Gibson to play the part instead. At least the aliens had the good sense not to take Nicholas Cage with them.

On a more serious point, if as I suspect the film makers were trying to putting a re-enchanted New Age spin on things akin to what Shyamalan attempts in Signs, I wonder if this aspect of the film might not again unwittingly point to some of the more problematic aspects of Theosophical-New Age-ufological apocalypticism? Especially those tinged with the suspect racialist undertones of Victorian social evolutionism (if not the outright discourse of ethnic ‘cleansing’), and wherein the perfect ‘Nordic’ or ‘Aryan’ extraterrestrials are coming to save the chosen from an ‘impure’ world. In this respect, the children in the film who are ‘the chosen’ seem to have remarkable knowledge and innate telepathic abilities – perhaps a reflection of real-world New Age beliefs surrounding ‘indigo children’ (as well as some of the ideas regarding human-ET hybridisation emergent from alien abductee narratives) who are seen to represent a more ‘spiritualised’ step in human evolution. The rest of us, being unnecessary and ‘impure’ throwbacks can be consigned to the dustbin of history as the ubermensch forge ahead to create a perfect and ‘pure’ world. (I use the terminology of purity and pollution here purposely, as I think it perhaps one of the most powerful sets of symbols/metaphors that humans have deployed for social and political ends – especially in the discourse and practice of racism, ethnic violence and genocide).

I’m prone to put my own sly spin on what this movie might be about: that in fact its use of dodgy alien astronaut tropes actually undermines the very point it (seems) to be trying to communicate: that even the most secular of atheists must eventually abandon their disbelief and accept the comfort that there is ‘more’ (in a spiritual sense) to this world than this world itself. Cage’s character’s reconciliation with his religious father and seeming acceptance that death is not the end is problematic because the saviours appear to be aliens and not angels. The film seems to pushing toward a recognition that perhaps the aliens look like angels because perhaps they really are angels. But the other subtextual possibility that the film seems to contain is one emergent from the very same demythologising alien astronaut hypothesis that Lovecraft prefigured in his work: that there are, in fact, no angels; angels and other representations of the supernatural are simply the symbolic cloth in which we clothe the nuts and bolts matter of extraterrestrials. This seems to be supported by the fact that the ET’s craft first manifests in a form akin to the vision of Ezekiel which is referenced earlier in the film: all wheels within wheels. In any case, this infers that the ETs certainly have interfered before in human history. In other words, the aliens don’t look like angels; rather it is the case that we have constructed our image of angels based on extraterrestrial interventions in our past history.

This being the case, there doesn’t seem anything to contradict the notion that the end of the world as it happens in the film is anything other than meaningless random chance. Or as suggested above, perhaps an act engineered by the aliens themselves. Indeed, the more I think about this the more I consider it to be a distinct possibility according to the logic that underlies the film: if the aliens possess the godlike power of fortelling the future, why could they not have stopped the solar flare with their technology? Given that they knew this was going to happen so far in advance and (presumably) harbour such altruistic attitudes towards humans, why didn’t they take the time to save all of the world’s population? In fact, their altruism only seems to extend toward children with special powers, not us ‘less evolved’ primates. Or maybe they weren’t fortelling the future but using their technology to manufacture it and pass their well-laid plans as ‘prophesy’ (here I’m of course following the Clarkean adage that any sufficiently advanced technology will look like magic. Or in this case, religion). Cage, then, has simply (and understandably) fallen into the very human trap of manufacturing hope where there is none as a means of alleviating anxiety in the face of, well, a horrible death. Could I be right, then, that the belief that ‘this isn’t all there is’ turns out to be false consciousness (in this case, engendered by our alien overlords)?

I would like to think so. I’d also like to think that this was the subversive intention of the film-makers (especially in the context of the litigious New Age science-fictional clap-trap spiritualities that appear to be rampant amongst the Hollywood hoi-polloi – what happened to all the Satanists?), but I imagine that’s beyond the realms of possibility given that this is a movie starring Nicholas Cage, which is about unsubtle as you can get.

The Jennifer Morgue is done!

[openbook booknumber="9780441016716" displayoptions="1" hidelibrary="true"]Well I burned through the second book in Charles Stross’ The Laundry series dubbed The Jennifer Morgue. This story picks up alomst three years after the previous book and finds out favorite necromantic computer hacker has become a somewhat reluctant regular in Field Ops. Stross makes great use of the Bond stereotype in this novel, and there is not a flat character to be found.

Stross should be commended on this book as a sterling example of a good damn read. Even if you are not into the Lovecraftian undertones that are heavily present throughout the novel, you will surely enjoy the ways in which the protagonist, Bob Howard, finds himself in one pickle after another. How many characters that you know of get to skinny dip with a gorgeous super model assassin from beneath the waves out of a necessity to survive while chased by a villanous billionaires henchmen?

Sounds like a Bond plot doesn’t it? Well it is of sorts, but you absolutely must read it to understand why it most assuredly is not. This is an amazing ride of a novel that makes me want for more in a way that I have not encountered since being introduced to The Dresden Files.

I am not entirely certain what is up next, but in following in the tradition of late I think it will be another Stross novel. Possibly Saturn’s Children.

The Atrocity Archives by Charles Stross

This might not come as a huge surprise to some of you, but I like Charles Stross. The first novel of his that I read was Halting State in hardback almost two years ago. It quite literally gave me a new outlook for SciFi, his ability to mesh the present with the not-so-distant future was superb. And the tech that he introduced was all too believable. It seemed like I was reading a fiction thriller written 50 years in the future. It was amazing.

[openbook booknumber="0441013651" displayoptions="1" hidelibrary="true"] The Atrocity Archives had the same effect upon me for Lovecraftian horror that Halting State did for generic SciFI. I am not sure how this series flew under my radar for so long, it is a very enjoyable read. The basic premise of both the novella and short story within the Atrocity Archives is that, yes the eldritch horrors do exist, the government knows this and has set up super-secret intelligence agencies to thwart anyone who might intentionally, or unintentionally, invoke some unspeakable horror from a parallel universe.

Along with that comes a lot of technological gadgetry that has been created using some of that eldritch knowledge. This is a Lovecraftian Spy Thriller, a splendid piece of work. There are some problems that I found with mainly one character within The Atrocity Archives. She seemed flat and almost dead to situations that would have made Freud hang from lampposts covered in his feces and screaming at the top of his lungs about his Oedipal fantasies. But then I remember that this is almost 6 years old and the writer has matured greatly since then, and that everyone in the novel is decidedly British.

Overall, it was a wonderfully entertaining read that kept me on the edge of my seat in fear and humor. And honestly, what more could we ask for?